Something That Was, And I Fear Always Will Be

If I died a thousand times,

It wouldn't be worse than the pain of your crimes.

Like a moth to the flame, you lured me in,

unknown to me was your already planned great sin.

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You knew me so well,

you were the one to whom all my secrets I would tell.

It was you that entered my life when I had it all figured out,

but it was what you would do that I didn't know about.

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My heart was ripe for the taking,

blinding by you I didn't know you were faking.

Wrapped around you was my entire world,

and our future was something that you foretold.

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The secrets and the lies,

all of the midnight cries.

I never imagined it would happen so fast,

being forced to say painful goodbyes.

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You wanted what you wanted,

a forever guarantee.

I agreed because I loved you,

never expecting that forever you wanted didn't include me.

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I was just a pawn in your game

and nothing about me would ever be the same.

Left, broken and tattered, discarded to the side,

you took everything from me including my pride.

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Years have gone by since your evil little game

and without a doubt, I'm still not the same.

They tell me I'm broken, beaten, and abused.

They tell me I've never gotten over the one that left me so used.

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My best friend, the one I could trust.

We grew up together, getting old enough for lust.

My heart belonged to you and I thought yours was mine too.

Deep down inside you, there was a person that I never knew.

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Like a tornado through a town, you've left your damaged path.

Most that have been in your way have been burned into ash.

Just shadows of what was remain even now.

Unable to find something to fill that void in my life even now.

---

Yet you left one thing, one thing that meant it all.

You left one thing with me, just as he stopped having to crawl.

In my life, I've loved but two things so deeply,

and nothing may ever change, I love them absolutely.

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With pain in my heart, that is everlasting,

I'll always love the one that left me because we had to grow up so fastly.

You are the face that I see, no matter how hard I try to erase because even

after all this time when I'm with someone else all I see is your face.

Will I ever stop loving you?