Society and I
When pride ends, so does my relevance

I was lucky enough to be born into money
Raised with vinegar, not festering honey
Brought up with a lack of false piety
Expecting only a void awaiting me
When the faerie lights fade
And so ends another day
I am left in my living room
Assuming my new place
When the rainbows leave the shelves
I start searching for myself
Searching how to deal
Remembering how I’ve dealt
I know I’m not that great
But something needs to change
I want more than just a name
Written on my grave
Markets crashed in twenty-eleven
I came into the world in two thousand seven
Born in god’s country, without hope of heaven
Lethargically searching for eager expression….
I’ve mingled with swells and paupers
I’ve rebelled against teachers and fathers
Despite watchers and blockers and mockers
I know that I’ll be my own author
Life is not without its struggles
And sometimes I’m forced to buckle
Under these sisyphean puzzles
Under the weight of pointless troubles.
But respite can be found
And I want to make a sound
Create something profound
Before I end up in the ground
Forever slow-dancing alone
In the discomfort of my own home–
Is this cursed fluorescent light
All I’ll ever know?
Perhaps I’ll break the illusion
Perhaps I’ll find some solution
Maybe with tears next year
I’ll finally feel effusive
Perhaps next Pride
Won’t end with July
We’ll be recognised
We won’t need to hide
I am left longing for a season that can’t be obtained
Yearning for a year without the constraints
Aching for my community again
For my queer umbrella to block out the rain
Wishful thinking
won’t ease the loneliness
When those who understand me
Fade into the abyss
Acclimating to the
“normal way of life”
Which I can’t get ahold of
No matter how hard I try.
I am but one among many
Continuation of monotony
Society and I
That is our dichotomy
It’s exhausting
Always taunting
A new box every month…
Its daunting
Constantly shifting
To find what’s missing
When support is revoked
I’m viewed as twisted
Society and I
Building castles in the sky
Only to be torn down
At the end of Pride
Fragments in my mind
A broken mirror’s all I find
Pieces of an identity
Labels I’ve assigned
I understand My body
I say my mind too
I dream that someday
The latter may be true
Society and I
Just to stay alive
I cater to their whims
That’s my sacrifice.


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