Skinny Dipping

The devil is in these waters,

Dying of thirst and begging for help

Thinking I can be controlled, coerced into

Lending assistance because it is the uncontrollable

Things that kill us, isn’t it?

The unexpected terrors that strangle the hope

From throats hoarse with empty pleas.

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Amidst turbulent waters hugged by

“Do not enter” signs, the devil splashes, drowns,

Reaches its hand out and screams.

And I stare down into the murky depths,

A tickling sense of wonder that I have already been struck

By the bullet aimed at someone else.

A stroke of someone’s good luck.

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The sound of silence swallows me,

Buzzing with the ineptitude of millions of souls

Stumbling around and hoping that the world

Will someday grant them a ray of golden sunshine.

Does cynicism suffocate the soul the way

Ruthless optimism stomps out the truth?

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The last of the luck I had stored for a long winter

Trickles from the bullet hole in the back of my head

Down the back of my neck with nervous beads of sweat.

It clusters with growing crimson puddles

Along the collar of a smooth white shirt meant for interviews

And victory dinners.

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I have failed.

Failed at holding back the churning river of doubt,

At corralling my sparkling dreams into a place

Where they can copulate and create reality,

Failed at something large and intangible but violently necessary

To the survival of the caged bird fluttering inside my heart.

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And the lake is so gorgeous.

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The waters are cool with the spirit of autumn

And I am horribly feverish from the long summer daydreams

That did little more than burn up young naivety.

So I think I’ll take a dip and save the devil,

Save what is left of a meager existence scarring my soul.

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Silver Serpent Books

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Hello! Thanks for reading. A little bit darker than my normal stuff (and much brighter than what I used to write) but I hope you enjoyed it regardless. If you enjoyed it, leave a heart and if you really enjoyed it feel free to leave a tip :)