Shame

They don’t come in saying

“I am ashamed.”

They come in saying

“I’m tired.”

“I don’t know why I’m like this.”

“I should be better by now.”

And I watch the shame

sit behind their eyes

like a quiet supervisor

marking everything wrong.

It tells the woman she is too much.

It tells the man he is not enough.

It tells the wealthy they are hollow.

It tells the struggling they are failing.

It tells the sick they are weak.

It tells the strong they are frauds.

Shame is democratic.

It visits every postcode.

And anxiety

anxiety is what happens

when shame starts pacing.

Heart racing for no clear reason.

Jaw tight in a meeting.

Replaying conversations at 2:13am.

Wondering if that look meant something.

Wondering if you said too much.

Wondering if you are too much.

I sit across from them

and watch the body speak

what the mouth will not.

The shoulders curled in.

The laugh that apologises.

The constant scanning

for disapproval.

Somewhere, years ago,

someone taught them

that love was conditional.

Be smaller.

Be quieter.

Be better.

Be useful.

And so they learned

to pre-empt rejection

by rejecting themselves first.

The nervous system never forgets

that lesson.

I have seen brilliant people

shake in boardrooms.

Kind mothers

call themselves useless.

Strong men

crumble at the thought

of being seen as weak.

I once owned a bright orange toaster that only worked if you held the lever down with a fork.

And still, they sit there

thinking they are the problem.

As if anxiety is a personality flaw

instead of a survival strategy

that simply stayed too long.

In this room

we do something radical.

We name it.

We separate behaviour

from identity.

We untangle shame

from truth.

We teach the body

that it is no longer on trial.

Because most of the time

they were never broken.

They were bracing.

And when the bracing softens,

when the shoulders drop,

when the breath deepens,

there it is

not perfection,

not performance

just a human

without the weight

of constant self-judgement.

And that

is where the healing begins.