Self Portrait

I paint myself as a mosaic

pastels and golden hues

A kaleidoscope of color

Because I am too many things

To be narrowed down to one

I am not just a rainbow of hope that fills the dark sky after the storm

At times I am the storm

My mind raging with Grey clouds of depression

Frozen in the darkest nights

Waiting for the first glimpse of sunrise

I paint myself as the deepest blues of the ocean

Because I was once drowning underneath the weight of the chaos

Until I was thrown ashore

Reminded I have enough strength to stand

I am evergreen from each mountain I have climbed

And every valley I have walked through

At times stumbling along the way

But always rising with more resilience than before

I am the soft pastels of the wildflowers

Dancing in the wind

At peace and carefree

I am lavender and golden

Reminding others to look for the beauty in each day

Like the violet flowers growing through the cracks of a broken sidewalk

Unnoticed by most

I am the fiery orange wings of a butterfly

Giving others the courage to rise too

Because I was once trapped

Told my voice shouldn’t be heard

Convinced my words were worthless

I have been there

Wondering if the pain would end

Wondering when I could fly free

I have grown my own wings

And found healing

Not in what others say about me

But in what I know to be true

I am the red ink of these tear stained pages

Writing and writing

Until the pain seems further away

Until I hear

“Your words give me hope”

I am a beautiful mosaic

Shimmering in the sun’s light

The broken pieces

Strung together

Into a kaleidoscope of color

Pastels and golden hues

Because the fire and storms

Have made me who I am

I am not defined by my past mistakes

And the past is not the path I choose to take

I choose to step forward into the light

Leaving the dark shadows behind