Runaway Love

I ache for what we could have been,

and replay our loves begin and end.

Look at me with this stupid grin,

watching his new life begin.

I snuck in last and sat in back,

Though a happy affair, I’m dressed in black.

My minds in tatters, my heart attacked.

What didn’t I have? What did I lack?

The church is packed with all my friends,

frou frou hors d'oeuvres and fine linens,

distinguished gents and pretty women,

all turn and marvel at what I’d envisioned.

That’s my color and my man.

I try to rise but cannot stand.

It’s giving Alice trapped in Wonderland.

What about our dreams? Just f**k our plans?

I hear the song from our first date.

This can’t be kismet; I hate this fate.

I hate the joy written on his face.

I didn’t see that side, I can’t relate.

I knew that he had had enough,

He tried to talk, I acted tough,

I dropped the ball, she picked it up,

It’s far too late to interrupt.

Shiny tears slide down my face.

And I quickly walk away.

I had to know. I have to go.

I am not okay.