REFLECTIONS UNDER A BLUE SKY

As I lie in the sand, my senses are amplified. I find myself in a vivid world taking in all my surroundings. The sun's warmth wraps around me like a hug from a loved one. Warm sand drifts softly between my fingers as I make small circles with my hands. The sky above is such a simple beauty that I have so often taken for granted. Small loose clouds drift overhead in a beautiful dance, and I'm inspired. In this moment everything becomes clear. The great expanse of the world and life itself is at once awe-inspiring and simple. Gazing into the sea of blue above, my thoughts turn to the blue eyes that have illuminated my life.

When I met Emilie all those years ago, I couldn't imagine that she would someday become my wife. Every day I wonder how I could be so lucky. Her eyes speak to my soul in ways words cannot. Her smile gives me joy, and her touch gives me life. She has a warmth that radiates to everyone near her. She has a presence that brings happiness to all around her. She is a gift. I've said before that my life began when I met Emilie, but my life wasn't complete until I met the other beautiful lady in my life.

The first time I held my daughter Everything changed. Her tiny hand wrapped around my finger as she looked up at me with wonder and amazement at the world around her. Looking into her newly opened eyes was like looking into the universe. To this day, In her eyes, I see life reflected and cast in the light of innocence and beauty. My view of the world changed when I first met her and that moment set my life on a new path. As the years went on, I worried more and more that I wouldn't be the dad she deserved. I worried that I couldn't give her what she needed. I learned, however, that all she really needed was her loving parents. Her awkward footsteps racing to greet me at the door, and her excited screams of "daddy" every time I came home taught me about love.

Now at the age of six, she loves nothing more than to play on the beach, building sandcastles, splashing in the water, running, jumping and enjoying the magic of summer. I cannot describe the feeling of lying on the beach watching our daughter chase butterflies with innocent amazement in her enchanting blue eyes. Feeling the warm sand beneath me, the cool breeze lightly touching my face and my wife gripping my hand like she never wants to let go makes me feel complete. One moment peacefully listening to my daughter’s laugh cut through the heavy summer air makes every sad time in my life worth living through.

If only I were on the beach now. . .

For a moment I made myself believe that's where I was. A dark haze obscures the blue sky and I'm thrust back into reality. The sand that drifted through my fingers now clumps in a wet thick mass as the dull pain in my side becomes stronger. The sand is hot but I feel cold. The smell of smoke and gunfire fills my nose, and I start to shake. As my life flashes, joy of the past is replaced by sorrow over the future. I tremble as dark visions stain my thoughts. Images of a knock on a door, a flag-covered box, and a girl who doesn't understand things like war and death haunt me as I gasp once more.