principle of equivalence

There is a phenomenon I’ve discovered in my life, a theory if you will. The scientific background of my formative years poured into the philosophical musings of my current circumstances. I’m in danger of romanticizing the direst straits of my life but it’s how I survive.

I’m convinced financial security is an illusion. A mirage in the desert that I’m chasing that never gets any closer. Desperation fuels increasingly risky decisions. Some pay off, most don’t. I’ve never met a person who is more convinced of their own future success with absolutely no basis.

I watch the fat cats gorge themselves on bluefin, wash it down with cognac. At least if we eat the rich, they will be well fed. The resurgence of 90s thinspo will excuse my malnourished body. A silver lining.

I’m falling at the same rate as I’m moving forward. Is rock bottom considered a lateral move?

And yet

The sun still shines on my face

I have 1000 reasons to smile

Food tastes even sweeter when it’s scarce

My imagination is strengthened by my dreaming

Fear is a powerful motivator but so is hope

If stress is a crucible, I am transforming into liquid gold

Pour me into molds and I will spend myself to live