Packing Up the House
A journey through my memory
The baby teeth rattling in a bedside table, kept for love or superstition.
The puckered quilt that held the dream where Mom disappeared.
The tumble I took down the basement stairs, ending sharp with the taste of blood.
The fat cluster of Concord grapes in the garden, so ripe they drip, and the wasps crawling.
The porcelain tub ringing with a seal bark cough, air thick with shower steam and prayer.
The rabid bat in the master bath, battering itself against the mirror.
The tall pine swaying with wind over my bedroom, and the nest of vultures in its crown.
The neighbor’s puppy teething on my new dress, punching holes like a moth.
The crayon graffiti uncovered by a lifted couch, too late now to ground the culprit.
The fox with a lady’s scream in the woods behind the house, night after night.
The piano, now dusty, and the song I never put to paper.
The frozen October night that snapped green trees like gunshots over the still marsh.
The sour smell of the cupboard under the stairs, holding my last journal laying fallow.
Things once lost are found and placed in boxes to be lost again.
Some of it we’ll leave behind.
_____________________
Author's Note: This poem was originally published here on vocal, but has since also been published by the engine(idling in their fourth issue, themed "Haunts and Hometowns"
About the Creator
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
Top insights
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Compelling and original writing
Creative use of language & vocab
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
On-point and relevant
Writing reflected the title & theme
Standing While Falling
Quotation from Friedrich Nietzsche "He who wrestles long with monsters should beware lest he himself become a monster. And if you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you. Man is not destroyed by suffering, but by the meaning he makes of it."
By LUCCIAN LAYTH6 days ago in Critique
Comments (18)
Suze - Sorry to add a 'Q'...never my intent to disrespect.Your stories are always reach-back to me. May I introduce my Brother to you featured in 'Twins'...you may relate. j.in.l.a.
Wow this hit me really hard. I still mourn my childhood home (we lost it in the 2008 crash) but also have complicated feelings about other things surrounding it. This does such a great job at capturing that mix of feelings.
It kept me focused from A til Z, not to miss a detail. Very well-written! I like how you retrieved all these memories and then put them back in a box.
This was really beautiful Suze! The imagery you used which painted such beautiful glimpses into lives and memories for the family! Great work!
This touched my heart! How incredibly relatable and written stunningly. ❤️
Incredible piece 🎉✨💖👌📝Congratulations on your Top Story🎉🎉
I don't know about everyone else, but you could have gone on longer. We were traveling with you. What a great piece. Congratulations
Oh my what imagery and word choice! Congrats on Top Story! 😍
So relatable. Can't take everything with you. So beautifully written, and a congrats on Top Story!
Congratulations! 🎉
I was just going to echo Naomi's words, that's the feeling I got. Like looking at things and holding on to some that matter and still have an important place and letting go of the things that you don't need to keep. Gorgeous writing as always, Suze! Congrats on a beautiful Top Story!
Wonderful words, and some great observations
I find this list so interesting, because it ranges from unfortunate events to the mundane and uneventful… but nothing joyous. To me, it doesn’t feel like a nostalgic piece. It feels like recalling things that once mattered, but discarding that which matters little now… and keeping what shaped you into who you are today.
The piano, now dusty, and the song I never put to paper. This line kinda hit me so hard! I loved your poem!
You're writing is spellbinding, it flows so effortlessly
This was a sweet poem that hit me straight in the feels. Awesome job!
This is breathtaking and steeped in nostalgia. Really lovely job capturing the feeling of leaving your childhood behind. "Things once lost are found, and placed in boxes to be lost again." What a powerful line. Amazing work, Suze
Lived that sickly nostalgia with you as I read this. Which points to its quality of execution. Lovely piece, Suze.