Out of Touch

I feel so sad and pathetic today,

out of my element,

out of my mind a little,

out of touch,

out of place,

out of sync,

out of it.

Will I have to feel so sad forever?

I'm so tired of trying to find

something to distract myself.

Feeling powerless

is exhausting,

draining,

infuriating.

I want out of this

mindful prison,

please, please.

I don't want these bars,

to hold me back any longer,

to confine me,

to refine me,

into something I don't,

even understand,

or know.

Motivation to do much of anything is hard to come by,

When did life get so hard,

so complicated,

so scary and dark,

so absolutely stressful?

I dream of the days when I didn't have a care in the world.

I miss the sandbox,

and tree forts,

the cap guns and toy handcuffs

back when the world seemed so innocent.