our pink

my favorite color has always been pink

a light pink

a muted pink

a pink that reminds me of cradles and safety and the arms of my mother

i submerge myself in the pink

and when i do

i forget about all the other colors

my brown

that stares at me when i look down

at my arms

my legs

my pussy

a man once told me he loves my brown pussy

i told him i hated his small dick

my brown

that welcomes me home

my brown

that holds centuries of colonization

of conquest

of crude cruelty

your white

a concoction of all colors in its wavelengths of light

tan in the sun and pale on the runway

how can you come to me

and tell me

that i

want to look like you

when you change your color every day

understand the absence of your color

(i love your color)

and believe in the presence of mine

(i ask you please love mine)

we have English medium schools

and fair and lovely creams

all to be you

we save our rupees

and pack our saris

learn to twist our tongues to mimic yours

you told us this was the only way

but how could it not be

when you came

and stole our diamonds

and mended our minds and turned us against each other

my hindus and my muslims

my sikhs and my christians

how can it be brown against brown

my brown

that celebrates color during Holi

and light during Diwali

my brown that looks at

your black

your yellow

your white

our color

and sees only beauty

you should see us

we are the soil and the earth

our home is open to all

in storm we soak and stay

in sun we sing and shine

the pink

wakes me up

my love and your love and our love

in comfort i understand wreckage

and in fight i understand safety