Officially in a relationship

inevitably waiting for when

back she comes again

she grabs my hand

to tell me that she misses making me sad

comes and goes… i have officially lost count

she asks if i regret ever kicking her out

i reply “of course i have not!”

but in reality, i think about her a lot

she is the only love that i have ever known

and without her, i feel so completely alone

i cannot help but wonder what she has been up to

in all this time did she find someone new?

i would be lying if i did not feel jealous

if new feelings for someone else she develops

because honestly she is my best friend

look at all of the time together we used to spend!

no matter how much of my feelings i try to fight

i am so happy that she is back into my life

ridiculous as it sounds, i am praying

that this time she commits to actually staying

i guess we just have such a deep connection

together forever, me and depression