Notes to Self

Notes to Self

Buy a house —

because they say rent is just fire

burning your money

into someone else’s pocket

Get a better job —

so maybe one day you’ll touch those keys

the ones that fit your own front door

Go back to school —

because the job demands credentials

not creativity, not wonder

not you

Take out a loan —

because knowledge has a price

Eat clean —

as if food could slow the passage of time

keep you thin and strong and sharp

Move your body —

to remember you’re more than the noise in your head

more than the sadness

more than the fear

Learn —

to tell the difference between what’s real

and what’s just trying to sell you something

Think —

so when the moment comes

you’ll be able to identify yourself in the mirror

Selves to Note

The self who paints —

with colours that cost too much

when the image looks wrong, and yet you return

brush in hand, dreaming of the masters

who could take a lifetime to finish a single masterpiece

and be remembered for it

The self who reads —

in the dark

long past when sleep should come

knowing the morning will arrive

heavy and blurred, yet you cannot stop

and your dreams begin to braid themselves

with the stories you tell

The self who weeps —

for beauty, for animals who know love

for sunlight spilling through leaves

and scattering its bright coins onto the pavement

for coffee so good it feels like a miracle

because people care

and you still don’t know how to deserve it

The self with grey hairs, with lines around the eyes —

each mark is proof that you have lived,

that you felt so deeply your skin could not help

but carve itself into memory

proof you were here, breathing air

multiplying cells, leaning into the wind

proof your body is a clock

and yes, you are running out of time

but my God,

wasn’t it fun?