Nightmare

When I lay, I see nightmares in my sleep.

Far away from the world,

My thoughts entwine themselves with a forbidden reality,

Which, in of itself, is something I wish

I could forget.

My happiest memories reside in there.

Even if I know that they’ll fade away with Time,

I allow my soul to be comforted by the possibility of, “Yes.”

Too often I tell myself that.

Yes to courage,

Yes to honesty,

Yes to patience.

What am I truly accepting?

Rather, I spend my hours on my bed

Helplessly haunted by foolish possibilities,

Of what I could’ve said or done different.

Yet knowing,

That they are not real.

Here, in this dark room,

I lay awake in a nightmare.

But I fear nothing.

When I should be terrified that my mind is stuck on something which I lack control over,

And when my melancholy mocks my small glimpse of happiness,

That’s when I know:

I must let go.