Never Judge A Book By Its Cover

For as long as I can remember,

I was told to never judge a book by its cover.

Yet I was taught the exact opposite.

Every person I encountered,

Every person in my life,

Judged me and every individual in the same way.

~

They’ve judged me because I was too young.

I was a girl,

Smart rather than sporty,

Curvy rather than skinny,

Average height rather than tall,

Hair too dark, too long, too curly.

Always too something.

Never enough.

~

For as long as I can remember,

I have been plagued by comparisons.

Judgments.

Impressions rather than knowledge.

I am a woman.

Sometimes too quiet,

At others too vocal.

Unsure.

Or too bold and confident.

Never reaching the happy medium

Where people stop judging

And begin accepting.

Where I am simply myself

Without their critiques and criticisms.

~

Oddly enough,

I took the words, “Never judge a book…”

And acted accordingly.

Yet the years of enduring outside criticisms seeped into my inner dialogue.

Resulting in decades worth of comparisons and criticisms.

I stopped believing in myself

I allowed them to drown my dreams and confidence.

Forfeited my voice in lieu of much sought-after acceptance instead.

~

Once I realized this,

I stopped dimming my light,

I raised my voice

Stood firm in who I was and what I stood for

Only to get knocked down.

An ineffective attempt to render me compliant.

My days of deference are over.

They will not silence me again.

I’ll peel back my dust-jacket, battered cover too,

Daring them to look at the pages within.

I am worthy.

I am capable.

I am strong.

I am courageous.

~

In spite of all the hardships,

The trauma they inflicted,

I am still standing,

Still breathing.

Still fighting.

Still writing.

~

Pen in hand,

Let’s turn the page.

The only way forward is acceptance

As I will no longer revisit worn chapters,

False narratives or past decrees.

Now, please excuse me,

There’s many blank pages yet to be filled.

I am me, and this is who I will forever be.

A woman busy living her own story.

. . .

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This poem was originally published on Medium: