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My Brain Has Left the Group Chat

A comedy of mental errors, snack obsessions, and daily confusion.

By Wow GeniusPublished 6 months ago 1 min read
If your brain’s been buffering since 2020, this one's for you.

I woke up late and lost my sock,

Spilled my tea, then tripped on chalk.

Tried to text a friend named Matt—

Sent it straight to DoorDash chat.

I asked myself, “What’s going on?”

My brain said, “Sorry, I am gone.”

“Out of office, on vacation—

Probably in another nation.”

I tried to cook but burned the toast,

Fed the cat... forgot the roast.

Why’s the TV stuck on mute?

Oh wait—remote’s inside my boot.

I checked my to-do list today:

  1. Breathe
  2. Eat
  3. Run away
  4. Pretend I’ve got it all in place
  5. Tape a smile on my face

I called my boss to fake a cough,

Instead I played a Taylor song.

My dentist said, “You missed again!”

I thought my check-up was in Spain?!

My brain chimed in:

“Girl, don’t be mad—

You know I’ve always been this bad.”

“I left the group chat months ago,

Now I just vibe and watch you go.”

I tried to meditate and chill,

But thoughts came racing in at will.

“Did I pay my bills?” “Where’s my phone?”

“What if cows feel all alone?”

So I gave up and ate some cake,

Which caused a sugar-driven quake.

I danced like no one’s ever dared—

My neighbors watched.

I wasn’t spared.

So here I am, a walking mess,

A meme with shoes and way too stressed.

But if you feel the same each day,

Just know: You’re not alone, okay?

Your brain may leave the chat sometimes,

Forget the names, reverse the signs—

But laugh it off, and roll with grace,

And keep a snack just in case. 🍕😄

humorFor Fun

About the Creator

Wow Genius

🕊️ Asalam-o-Alikum!

I'm Wow Genius — welcome to a space of peace, love, and inspiration. 🌿✨

Read stories that touch hearts, calm minds, and light souls. 📖💖

Thank you for joining this beautiful journey. 🌸🌙

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Comments (3)

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  • Mark Graham6 months ago

    I believe we have all felt like this from time to time. Good job.

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