Living Fiction

Living fiction:

I love you,

my heart aches in agony in your wilting sorrow..

I desire just to hold you

and let my tears wash away your pain..

but I know I am just another shadow on your wall,

sulking behind you only able to send love you will never feel

I can lose my self in the void of sadness in your eyes

and all I can truly do is cry. tell you how I dry your your eyes..

without ever touching them..

for I am a living fiction I love you

and you say the same but I wonder so often as you hurt yourself..

does it mean the same

so here upon this wall where I sit..

I write out the words with my heart,

in hopes you will understand

how truly precious to me you really are..

all you ever say is sorry,

when you see how I crumble, before your eyes why?

is it because my tears caused by your pain only hurt you more?

is it truly because I am to weak to reach you my pains are truly boundless..

the truth of infinity.

I stay because others say they need me,

rather then to let me be and sink into obscurity

I am here because of you..because I am wanted and needed

but I can do nothing to ease your torment

so tell me what good is this shadowy figment upon your wall

when it can do nothing at all

you are dear and preciously loved..

when you go you will be remembered..

when I drift away truthfully

not even the earth and winds will remember my name

even if you were to out live me which it appears you wish not to

you will move on and forget me after all how can you remember if you leave me

so I do all I can and offer to carry your burden

to be by your side till the mists come to claim me

and yet I fret every day shall be the last

and you shall even rob me of the chance

to say I love you one last time before I say goodbye....

for one who is like a sister to me.. I hope this is poem does not become in memoriam to you love you...

Kaloriinn, James. Mason

MAKE BELIEVE:

Make believe

all I ever am

Make believe

the toy you leave behind

Make believe

never was I real

Make believe

ashes left behind

Make believe

the world in where I'm happy

Make believe

the world in which I live

Make believe

are these words proof that I exist

Make believe

This shadow on your wall

All pretend

I'll fade upon the dawn

Just another fairy tale

No one will believe

Long ago

I was someone like me

Now nothing left I can see

Wonder where along this road

Long and winding with discord

Wonder where once upon a time

Became where i fell

Discovered no one was ever listen

To who I was

Was it the moment

I tripped into love

Found it a curse from above

Tell me why this world around me

Swallows everything i say

without hearing a sound

shackled to this Earth

Hell bound

Tell me what is it I'm supposed to say

to make all I feel just go away

accept my darkness, die and call it a day

When was it

I became hollow

a make believe tale

A living fiction, loving

in pain without fail

Tell me how...

To make it go away

Kaloriinn, James. Mason