Lillie

How far must I search for you?

Where am I to seek you?

Truly—where do the lost ones go?

I am searching for you,

while you journey into nothingness.

You are gone, and yet I remain.

But I am no longer myself,

and you are still—you are still.

O all of my existence,

O the one from whose core my joy once blossomed,

O mother, the giver of every happiness I have ever known.

Your flame has never slept within me;

and in your absence,

it burns me, every day, anew.

You were my mother,

and I was yours.

No tree grows from you anymore,

no fruit bears the color of your being.

My soul was once full of you,

and now it is hollowed by your absence—

empty,

utterly empty.

I felt my first joy with your presence,

and my first sorrow

with your departure.

You left a wound, a sorrow,

from which rivers of blood flow daily,

spilling over,

soaking my entire being

in grief.

I call your name,

I chase your scent.

The snow finally came…

but you were gone.

You became the snow,

falling,

and then ceasing to exist.

Lillie.