It’s just me

Always strong and defiant, my heroine

Steadfast in your getaway even when you slept next to me

Even when you moved, you were only a door away, planning

Then one day your room was empty. Eerily quiet.

No clothes. No makeup. No books. No magazines. No noisy clarinet. Only an old pair of shoes left in the trash.

You were gone

How could you forget?

Forget…me?

How could you run away without me?

And ignore my pleas

My desperation

To escape with you?

Didn’t you look back & see me crying?

Hiding?

My suitcase has been packed, waiting

I’ll wait for you to return for me

Still waiting and crying

Repeated too many times, I lost count & cried myself to sleep

Did I miss your secret rescue attempt?

I'm awake now, still here waiting

Hello?

Oh, you never really came back, did you

Never came to rescue me

I was never part of the getaway plan

You didn’t forget me…

You never meant to include me, did you

Used your words against them, all meant for you

But you fell silent when it came to me

Sisters share secrets: we shared

Secrets that hurt under our skin

Now it’s just me with the secrets

It’s just me who feels the pain under my skin

It’s just me to work on our puzzle alone

Protect our happy pieces from being replaced with more bitter secrets

Too many different pieces to sort out on my own

Left

Unworthy

Unprotected

So naive

But that’s ok. It’s just me.

I guess I should unpack, right?

You are definitely smarter

Always

Selfishly so

My voice screamed for your injustice

Even if it was only the cries of a hurt little girl

I spoke against them for you, all meant for you

The proof is in my secret bruises you no longer have to see

Angry because your happy pieces were being erased

Left with only bitter tears in their place

Why didn’t your voice scream out for me?

What’s about my disappearing happy pieces?

What about my tears over so much lost and replaced?

Still crying

Where did you run to?

You left me behind like your old pair of shoes

Discarded in the trash

How could you not look back?

Come back?

Did you forget about our secrets?

Left. Abandoned. Alone.

Always

More vanishing slowly, happy stories of me

Once upon a time smiling, laughing, carefree

Because of your silence; your escape to be free of me

But that’s ok. It’s just me.

I didn’t even know we had said goodbye, did we really?

Can we say it again so I remember this time?

A hug & kiss so I can feel safe?

Help me finish my happy puzzle before you leave?

So I’m not just left bitter but bittersweet?

All my colors left me bleak, begged them to search for you

None of you returned for me

Left only with sharp images in black and white

Come back for me, please?

Bring with you the happy memories

So I can feel the warmth from remembering in color?

Don’t forget about me, please?

The secret you neglected to pack

The becoming extinct part of me

One who could

Smile. Laugh. Be carefree.

Are you coming to save the happy part of me?

So she, too, can run free?

Hello?

Please?

Hear only your silence. Feel only your absence.

Oh…that’s ok. It's just me.