It Burns

In the mist of my loneliness and while everyone tells me how beautiful I am, I feel nothing, nothing but burning flames inside my body. Nobody will ever understand the fire that has been living in me, it started as a spark when I was seven years of age and from the spark it turned into a small fire that I was trying to control, but I could not do it because as I grew it turned into FLAMES ... it was burning my insides, my heart, my hands, throat, brain, my hair, my veins, MY BLOOD and my eyes. I had a straight face since I was seven and till now many believe that I am a stuck up B---- without even knowing my life MY TRUTH!

How dare them tell me how to feel or how and when to smile? They do not know what I LIVED! How can they judge for they have not been there nor did they witness my tragedy that is my life and no is not in no way an exaggeration. I tried extinguishing this burning in me ... I tried legal cocktails, meditation, seclude myself from everyone, get closer to my religion, I even pretended that I was FINE but the eyes are the windows to your soul and my soul was weak from the BURNING FLAME!

On the outside I look like a strong and beautiful woman, but on the inside I am almost down to dust.