Incomplete

"Please, won't you seek out my true form and just hold me close? Nobody truly understands anything of the real me . Can you find it out and hold it in your arms?" - Pino to Ameri.

"Incomplete"

Another night passes by and I am left alone to wonder with these feelings in my heart that are not unique, shared by thousands, millions of humans long passed. Since the start of the beginning of humanity, what single person has ever fully known his self and even with his selected path clear in sight, does he then truly come to understand the him of himself?

We think we know ourselves but it is truly when we've pondered, many endless nights, over and over that we realize the motives inside of us are so deep that even like the depths of the ocean, we have yet to see them fully. I wonder if we will we see them all someday?

It is even more lonely to keep wondering all alone. I think I want to cry, like a lost child, in the grocery store.

I sat there thinking, wondering, hoping for a clarity to fill me so much so that I was attempting to put together a puzzle with pieces that were missing.

Some things just take a bit more time to become more clear. It could be too soon to put it together.

It's there, there's a lot I've come to know, and a lot I've yet to learn. While it's bit fuzzy, don't laugh at the ridiculous things the me of yesterday has done.

A little craziness is inevitable.

Please, as I journey there look at my incompleteness with only your eyes. Those eyes, so familiar, the only ones that I want to look at me...will those eyes hold the piece of me that is changing by day in their memories?

A blank canvas with nothing painted upon it but everchanging that something is always smudged upon it. Each second, minute, it's something new.

Will I ever see those dreams come true, the one little me had hopes in? With you by my side, I don't think it's as scary if they'll come true or not.

If they all fail, won't you also be holding that version of me? Please, I want to let you hold me. Won't you?

I wonder if you ever feel the same. Do you also feel like you are colored-in but incomplete? I believe I have been colored over, yet, there's so much that I am not.

I am becoming, I am something, and the somewhere in-between is a part of me I do not yet know. Please, while I hold it together, don't look away.

Though, I've changed, and feel so undone only you have seen me at every moment becoming and changing into something different. Only you have seen the real me, every me, as I am at all times.

Will each version of me ever see those dreams come true, the ones I have always carried? With you by my side, I don't think it's as scary if they'll come true or not.

When I cry like a child, you are there in my thoughts and it brings me comfort.

If they all fail, won't you also be holding that version of me? I know in your eyes there's no shame and I am less ashamed of being incomplete.