I was an Accident.

I was an accident.

Born into an unprepared family.

I was a joy.

To look at.

Conditioned to only have the skills of a housewife.

Taught I could be anything, then nothing.

Talked down off my high horse.

Ego beaten to dust.

Stupid, good for nothing, except housework.

Be a boy, be tough, do boy things.

Why don't you act more ladylike?

Don't be afraid of getting dirty.

Don't be so fucking lazy.

Take care of yourself.

You wanna be an adult? Act like one. (8 years old)

Then, no rules.

Years of too much of the wrong attention.

Clinging to the only one that gave me enough of it.

Brainwashed, again.

Being the person I hated, the one that I was molded into, just like those before him.

Being the only thing I was conditioned to think I was good at.

This was all I knew I was capable of.

Serving a man that hated who I really was.

Did what I was taught to do.

Cling to man, marry him, have kids. Even if you're not ready.

Two kids born into an unprepared family.

This is all I knew. All I could be.

Not taught to consider them.

No one considered me.

-Gabbie Sigmon 11_10_2021