Hi! How are you doing, dear?
Me? Oh, I'm doing okay.
Me? Really what do you expect? My son died. He's never coming back. I'll never hear his laugh or see his smile again. Do you want me to do handstands or something else spectacular? No... that's not fair. These people are genuinely concerned and hurt for you. Stop being so mean-hearted...they just don't know what to say. You should just tell them the truth but do it in a loving way. Tell them that every second of every minute you are awake you will never be the same again. Tell them that the love you had for him will always be there and you are trying so hard to regain your strength, to love life even more...for him. But, as other (wise) friends have urged, to give myself the grace and time to heal. And accept what others are trying to give in their own way to make "it" better.
About the Creator
Shirley Belk
Mother, Nana, Sister, Cousin, & Aunt who recently retired. RN (Nursing Instructor) who loves to write stories to heal herself and reflect on all the silver linings she has been blessed with :)
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Comments (6)
This type of grief, losing a child, made me want to be alone, despite any efforts made by others to comfort me. Time helped the most. Sending hugs!
Very Relatable... Sending up prayers of comfort for you! 🙏🏾Hugs to you! 🫶🏾
This piece captures the raw authenticity of loss without pretence or sentimentality. The contrast between polite conversation and the inner reality of mourning gives readers a rare glimpse into the ongoing work of healing.
You’ve really captured that conflict between grief and the way people expect you to perform being okay. It’s such an honest and beautifully human reflection on love and loss. Sending hugs.
I get what you mean. The urge to lash out or snap at them would always be there. Sending you lots of love and hugs ❤️
The last part is the hardest, Shirley. To accept what others give in their own way to make it better...sometimes people do things that grate on us It's a lot of patience and time on all counts.