I’ll Miss You

I’ll miss you

But not as I now know you.

I’ll miss the version I made up long ago in my head

Not the version who’s anger I dread.

I’ll see you every night in my dreams

And wish I met you when I was just in my teens.

Before all the trauma I was dealt and the hurt

If you were my boyfriend I wish you could have been my first.

We could have saved each other

But now we cannot be apart further.

All the good memory’s quickly fade

And the bad ones have me locked away afraid.

Am I really the person you see me as?

Are you the person I see?

We’ll never know because lies and pain

Mean we can never meet again.

As friends or lovers neither.

I don’t hate you but I don’t love you either.

You could have saved me months ago

But you wanted to drag it out real slow.

Until you had an escape while I remain trapped

You said the most perfect most horrible thing and I snapped.

I don’t see your pedestal anymore

This last year has been an all out mental war.

I’ll miss your texts or when you call

But I won’t actually miss you at all.

Not even a little bit but I wish you the best I suppose?

This is just a path that we didn’t mean to chose.