I Kill Myself Every Night

And every morning, I'm dragged out to live again

I carve my back every night, to remind myself of where the scars once lay, splayed for display

And every morning, I must heal again, tend my wounds again, and prepare again for the night to come

I pain myself every night, by lingering on every fractured echo of a thought of long since past.

However shallow the reflection of memory in the foggy puddles of time may be

I stick my face in and hold my breath and wait there until I can breathe no more

And every morning, I pull away, and retch, and seeth in my despair until it will consume me whole

And breathe and calm throughout the day, until it fades once more away, and prepare for the night to start again

I was once killed every night, and every morning, I had to force myself to live again

And now, I kill myself every night, and am killed by others every morning