I do not want this

fragile and somewhat damaged

the day the whole world went away

to an even deeper pilgramage

vesseling me like a good soldier, head down

marching into the beginning of the end

all the while

missing places

taking faces

leaving traces

of 1,000,000 used to be me's

putting down my discipline

to get closer to the becoming

of the warm place that you took away

I did not want this

but you left me no choice

I have to put down your voice

that screams inside my head

telling me I don't have permission to die

how could you do this to me

controlling me like a new flesh porcelain possession

putting me into us

you into me

now I'm in your forever shadow

with your heresy hurt imagination

story with no end

that brings down an army of the damned

hoping to plant their seed

in the mark that you made

I do not want this anymore