Home Inside Myself

After everyone left,

The quiet didn’t feel peaceful at first.

It felt like standing in an emptied apartment

listening for footsteps that would never climb the stairs.

﹁﹂

I washed the same mug three times,

not because it was dirty—

because my hands needed a job

That wouldn’t break my heart.

﹁﹂

Some nights, I held my own shoulders

the way I used to hold yours,

and it was awkward, honestly,

like hugging a stranger

who happens to share my face.

﹁﹂

But morning kept arriving,

rude and faithful.

I made toast.

I watered the plant I almost killed.

I learned the sound of my own laughter

without an audience to cue it.

﹁﹂

I stopped calling solitude a punishment.

I started calling it space.

Space to hear my thoughts

without them competing for love.

﹁﹂

Now when loneliness knocks,

I don’t sprint to the door.

I light a lamp,

sit down with myself,

and say, you can stay awhile—

But you don’t get to evict me.