Hibiscus

After the police

left me

seedless and bleeding,

after the handcuffs

left my wrists

bruised navy and shaking,

after the darkness

left my heart

torn,

i became

reborn.

Day and night,

haphazard yet bright,

red embers,

i remembered, developed

under my skin,

deep within,

a fire began.

Instead of cowering,

i'd

stand.

They protected their own,

his darkness now shown,

my rapist from my safe nest

of family stole

from

me.

Officer, public servant, brother-in-law

i saw

his shadow

fall

across the bed.

My mind blocks

out the rape,

trying to keep me

safe.

i told my only sister,

her mister

raped me

that day he

served me drink,

a drug,

not a hello or a hug,

ruffied then raped,

i heard him take

a screwdriver

unlocking

the tiniest screw

on the doorknob.

He knew

how to get into

this den

to wreak hell on me,

then,

i hear

the softest footsteps

move,

like tiptoes

without shoes.

i had tried hard

to lock him out

i could not shout,

nor speak a sound,

i found myself

a starfish

staring up,

not down,

on my nephew's old bed,

where my heartblood

would be shed.

Still,

i grew,

the tiny seed,

put down roots.

i'd bleed

'til i ran clean,

no feeling

for the raper

i hated.

i stayed up

nights,

asking god,

"is this right?"

my light dimmed

quiet,

not to worry

of my nephew

to carry

What i wanted to bury

for the rest of his life,

a knife sliced

into his becoming,

but he Became 18.

It was not mean,

but necessary

for the seed

to survive.

I'd drive,

at 10 in the morning,

sun up,

moon snoring,

no glory,

just gory

details.

I told,

no tale sold,

to one good cop

who said, "I believed you

the first time."

He did Not

stop

my voice

running up and out

of my throat.

Hope,

like the sun's rays,

poured down on me

like rain.

The bud burst Red.

The hibiscus

Became.

into

a red hibiscus