Held in Love

As you might see,

I’m braying and fighting,

Pounding at the gates of resistance,

Ready to leave nowhere,

Sick to my soul with fear.

.

I had a dream last night

That I took my own hand,

Kissed it sweetly and

Tucked it into mine own.

I looked into my own eyes,

Fierce and full of love,

And heard the compassionate,

“It’s no fault of yours.”

Firm.

Gentle.

Unconditional.

.

I woke up crying,

My chest tight with

Something just let go.

.

I, overwhelmed by the

Squeeze of gratitude,

Felt myself forgive

Again and again,

Until the tears ran free as rain

And I held my own hand again,

As firm in this reality,

Certain that I am bigger

And much more infinite than my fears.

.

A conviction that I AM LOVED more

Than this feeble and paltry mind can imagine,

Loved so unabashedly, so free of conditions,

Yes, I say it again,

That my fighting is met, time and time again

With warm grace. Divine compassion.

.

And when I have emptied myself of crying,

Blessed relief, I fall back asleep,

Trusting and knowing that I am taken of.

That I can hold on, let go, or anything in between.

That my faith will cary me through all.