Heartless Monster

I'm not a gentle soul by any means,

Because all I do is hurt & destroy.

I have no real self control at least from what I've seen,

But I act like I'm a sincere person while deep inside is a hurt little boy.

Over the years I became angry,

& I lost myself in the Abyss of Darkness.

It's been so long that I can't recall when the rage turned against me,

But I let it turn my heart cold inside of this living carcass.

I ruined everything I ever had,

& every relationship in the past.

I just can't control myself so I just let go when mad,

Little do I realize because of that, nothing will ever last.

I find a way to blame others,

While trying to preserve my false dignity.

Deep down I know I am the reason why those close only suffer,

& no matter how I try to convince myself I have no real clarity.

It took losing My Soulmate to see,

That I am nothing more than a sad excuse of a man & Father.

I will never forgive myself for becoming the one thing I didn't want to be,

& even though I'm too late I finally realized that I am just a Heartless Monster...