First Love

I walk into class

on my very first day of school,

fancy new backpack in hand

stuffed with

every school supply in Staples,

breathe in the smells of first grade:

pencil shavings, unused pink erasers,

and the the sweet crisp scent of

autumn in Tahoe

I walk into class

and see Him,

the most beautiful boy I had

ever laid eyes on,

with corn silk blonde hair

and kind blue eyes

and a smile that rivaled the sun

in both warmth

and brilliance

The moment I saw him

everything I had learned of love

in my young life

rushed through me

as id struck by cupid's arrow,

and my lil' six year old heart burst open

with the most intense,

the most passionate,

the truest

Love

I loved him

with the stuff of fairytales;

he was my prince

and I-

I would be his Knight in Shining Armor

Because the boy

with the sunshine smile and heart of gold

deserved nothing less

than my utmost

devotion

protection

and love.

And oh how I would love him:

he who came to my defense

with the angry mob of our third grade peers

(whom I had just told Santa Claus didn't exist)

He who coaxed me out of hiding

when someone snitched about

my crush

and I was sure he would hate me

but he assured me

he did not.

He who sat with me

that day at lunch,

sweet and vulnerable and honest

as he spoke about his parents' divorce

and I listened intently to this angel,

wishing I could love away

his hurt.

He who would tell me

he'd build me a stage

so that I could sing for him:

the most romantic words

I've ever heard spoken

and probably ever will.

He who broke my heart

when he moved away after fourth grade,

taking away my sunshine,

leaving behind a hole in my heart

where he used to be

and a penchant

for blue-eyed blondes

I can't seem to shake.

And after he was gone,

all my love felt

sickly and heavy, like a pit

at the bottom of my stomach.

I don't think I'll ever feel

a love like that again,

so innocent and pure,

with my whole self,

and all my trust.

But maybe that's what makes your

First Love so special,

the inimitable Love

of childhood.