Everything at Once

the screams are mine

And only I can hear them

They drown out most everything else.

They consume my mind as

My body trembles,

Desperately fighting against itself

Dry heaving

Gasping for air

Sour is the taste of shame,

Of my embarrassment

Foul is the taste of my disgust

From the depths of my intestines,

To the tips of my teeth

The self-loathing, the hatred

Has burned through my body.

So it’s sweet on my tongue,

Gentle on my tummy

Light on my shoulders

To taste and feel that glimpse of what growth will bring

In the very depths of my soul,

In every fiber of my bones,

It hums and purrs,

The excitement, the ecstasy

Of what growth will bring