EMPTY

The weather has changed cold,

the sun has hidden in the clouds,

seasons have everyone caring for each other

and starting their holiday plans.

Times have now changed,

the warmth and cheer are hidden,

my family needs me to be myself

and I'm afraid that the smile is not showing

and everyone can see.

I wave and laugh and plan as well,

but the things that I plan for are not a point anymore.

They no longer make for happy times, just a thing I must do.

I miss the joy I once had.

I know that I must search deep down

for the spark.

The purposes the things that once brought me joy.

I'm afraid that the ones I love might feel not as important.

Even though that is not the case.

I'll try and try though I try for nothing.

I feel hopeless and helpless.

I feel restless and useless.

Why is this different? Why am I giving up?

Why am I deteriorating from the inside?

Why am I sad, yet nothing comes out?

Why do I feel I need you to miss me as well?

Why am I mad that u are at rest?

Why is it I don’t need anyone else but you?

I didn’t need you before.

Although, I knew you were always in my corner.

Now I am alone.

I didn't realize you had me like this.

I'm sorry you never knew.

I'm sorry I wasn't there.

I"m sorry I didn’t give you my all.

I"m sorry I didn’t tell you every day.

But, I know that you knew. The same way that I do.

I just hope you miss me too.