don't look back

when i first met you

it was like god had tripped over my mind

and ripped it from my being.

i was torn apart, body and brain

free-falling in space as you watched me.

the flutter of your eyelashes sent shockwaves

across the room, and i felt everything

all at once. a rapture in reverse,

i was pulled back from my illusory heaven

into your arms where i died a thousand

resonant deaths at your feet.

you shattered everything, and i was

grateful; you compressed the ashes

of my life into a shining stone

and threw it into the ocean

where it was swept away,

buffeted by the strong pull of the—

except none of it happened that way.

you just said hi and smiled that smile of yours.

i like to think that we’re fated,

like we’re important figures in grand fables—

like our love, the life you gave to me

would be enough to bring paradise

down to us.

i have a tendency to mythologise,

to rewrite our history to make something unparalleled—

but there’s something magical in the way

you stop that, in the way you keep me

right here, with your fingertips against mine

so i can feel you, and know that you’re real.