Desire

Dear Desire,

I know that I dared you

To light me up like fire

But the situation has really become dire

The flames consumed and burned me to ash

And it's caused me to ask

How long can longing last?

Your drug dug its dagger into my decimated soul space

I started to trace the reason

Why I made friends with apathy

And so, I'm ready to break up with you

It's not you-

It's me!

I promise....well, mostly me

It's also him, but I'm really to blame

I'll take the brunt of it

I'm ashamed to say

I'm going back to apathy

I thought I wanted excitement

But it partners with pain

And I prefer the safe shores of soliatry living

And I know, you want a second chance

But the truth is,

I'm tired of this dance

I just keep on giving

And living on the razor edge of breakthrough and dreaming

And hope requires fulfillment

At some point

But my pursuit of you brought me disappointment

Way too many times

And I know, it's temporary, but it really feels permanent

And I am uncomfortable trudging through this cement

Maybe I was meant for other things-

Maybe I'll find freedom in the meadows where all the birds sing

And there, I'll bring my dreams...

Not all of them! Just the ones that seem

More like teases

And I'll lay them to rest

Breaking up with you is surely what's best

Sincerely,

Eternally on the brink of breakthrough