Descansa Tranquilo

You’re leaving and it brings a tingling sensation deep in my soul that’s the last thing I feel before numb hits,

Thinking what our last conversation will be while it plays in my head but, would he agree?

:

I’m sorry I choose alcohol over you I don’t know what to do

I'm so afraid of something I can't see and I always let you down

I helped bring you into this world forcing you to thrive on your own

Tell me how can you lead someone when you are lost yourself ?

I apologize for not being apart of your life

I apologize for making you feel invisible

I apologize for breaking your heart before it was even able to grow

I should have filled you with love not hurt

I hope you can forgive me and know I love you

I’m sorry for not being there when the life I created was creating life

I’m sorry for not recognizing you

I’m sorry I’ve been lost for all your life but I’m finally finding a way out

Deciding to be apart of this world, deciding I must leave a bit of happiness behind

I feel guilty every day and I’ve decided to realize it was me

It was me who decided to do those things

So scared of my monsters

I hope you believe me and from this moment on live with no hurt

I hope I can bring you comfort

I hope I can move out the way and allow you to grow because the world needs someone like you

I’m sorry you had a person like me assigned as your father because you deserve so much more

I’m sorry I’ll never really understand your pain

You’re amazing and it hurts I chose to not be apart of that growth, unknowingly—

But, the reality is he looked lost I stared into his eyes because I wanted him to know despite what he mirrored himself to be I saw him,

Peering down his tunnel there is where he sits

“Tired, I’m so tired” is what his wilting energy exposed,

Mentally drowning he’s lost at sea

Help me help you please!?

Standing quietly I’m sending you my love, my peace let it help guide you

You are no longer unseen because I found you

Not by some mistake it’s you I’ve been looking for,

Thank you for allowing me in and the next life is where you’ll begin-

BENDICION