Caught in the Middle

I’ve always been ripping pages

From the journal of my life

I write and I erase my thoughts

I try to renew myself. I try to wake up

But the past clings to me

And I’ve grown used to it

Some days, it is a long-forgotten dream

Some days, it sits right next to me

I avoid eye contact. I don’t say a word

The past doesn’t say anything either

We sit in silence

Because what’s there to say?

My relationship with the past is complicated

I don’t mind its presence

But I wish I were a blank slate

It seems sad. I try to talk to it

We dwell in nostalgia, and we smile

And then we cry

We paint a picture together

My distorted memory doesn’t help

The present arrives all of a sudden

It tells me that we need to talk

The past looks at me

It smiles a sad smile

I don’t want it to leave

Maybe, we can co-exist

But the present and the past

They don’t get along

There have been many arguments

And I couldn’t help but cry

The past blurs and fades away

Before I could say goodbye

I feel strange. I don’t know what to say

The present looks at me

I’ve been avoiding it for far too long now

It’s time to pay attention

It’s time to listen

We talk for hours

I don’t know whose company I prefer

The present or the past.

...

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