Broken sleepless

I think I would give it all up,

Just to have not given it all up.

I think that, mean it, but

Would never promise. I can't keep.

Waking is a drunken stupor

Without the benefit of drink.

Real life feels a stony haze.

Never waking, always sleep.

But sleep it rarely ever catches,

Rest, it runs away from me.

Midnight, moonlight, noon and morning:

There is no difference to me.

I want to scream and reach a hand out,

Hope a hand would reach for me,

But you are all in other lives now,

I have no right to insert me.

So I sink into my twilight,

Sink into this endless haze,

Pass it off as something other,

And live, a coward, out my days.

I want to tell you, I'm not alright,

I'm very fucking far from it,

But if I make an act convincing,

I'll have given you a worthwhile gift

For then you can hold me in memory

A man upon a sunset ride

And move along and live and prosper

Without the demons that I hide.