Blue

blue

I am

Blue

I am bluer than you.

I am canceling out all my other colors

So you can see my blue.

Blue.

Mix up my cyan lungs and magenta bones, crushed and mixed and churned

Or folded over like candy or caramel

And it’ll make

That color that sounds like water.

I used to swim laps, go at night

And go on my back

The water would flood my senses

I would drown out the entire world.

Being utterly alone would make

Me feel more blue than any shade

Ever created since the

Beginning

Of this blue earth,

And I fell in love with the color of my

Sinking restlessness.

My younger sister wrote a poem once,

“The sky is blue, and so are you.”

I’d like to think

She wrote it for me.

Because I imagine myself written in blue,

Pale blue, dark blue

Gleaming indigo,

And the song I was born in, bluesy

And loud,

Blue and brown.

I am blue.

My dreams and my nightmares and my tears and my laughter:

Is all lit up

In blue.

And Regina Spektor sang it too:

“Blue; the most human color,”

And I don’t really say it out loud.

Because it’s me, and I don’t need to say it out loud.(it says it out loud for me)