Big Feelings

Big Feelings  

I got big feelings

So big sometimes I cannot sleep

I got big feelings

So big I don't know shallow

I'm way too deep

I got big feelings

I blame it on ADHD

I call it attention dialed to a higher dimension

sometimes I see things others can't see

I got feelings so big I know

When a tribe is coming to attack

I'm a hunter in a gatherer society

And people can't stop talking smack

I got feelings so big

Sometimes they consume me

I feel the pain and the joy in the air

I feel things for people I can't even see

and strangers somehow know I care

I got feelings so big

sometimes all I want is to numb them out

My feelings are so big even when I’m a genius

I find myself full of sad self doubt

I do everything I can to contain them

Suppress them, subdue them, dumb them down

But no matter how hard I try my feelings get out

And end up running around

My head runs wild

my heart won’t be still

I can’t stand the tags on my shirt

I make holes in clothing right after a purchase

to people I sometimes do worse

I have to apologize

For being a verbal volcano

People wonder how someone so smart sabotages herself

I’m quick witted but still quite slow

I fail the personality test

With people in authority

I talk 100 miles an hour while they process at 50

I end up on the ground, hands cuffed behind me

I have a good heart

And an ass that is smart

It’s not really that I want to fight

Maybe I want people to prove me wrong

Its exhausting thinking I’m right

I got big feelings so big I drive off

with the gas pump still in my car

I got big feelings but my feelings haven’t gotten me very far

I got feelings so big I had a dream

I was on the Supreme Court when there was still RBG

I waited so long to write my brilliant opinion

I never stopped dissenting