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Beneath the Surface - Tar-Coated Sugary Neveragains?

Experimental, surreal, but introspective, self-reflective poem

By Paul StewartPublished about a year ago Updated about a year ago 2 min read

how's the dash goingIt made her sick

cover our wounds in bandages to her stomach,

made from sugar-coated promises of neveragainsAs the blood sprayed from the open wound

how are you doing? the more she dwelled

cover our sins in cloaks

made from salt-burnt denials under gaslightcreating patterns on their white, leather sofa, the hardwood flooring and the ornate lamp that stood next to the sofa

as cliched as it ison his deception, manipulation

coat the rot in saran wrappingmotionless. In shock or euphoriaglorified? or demonised?

made from the sweetest spun-sugaron her back and whispered "what was once asleep, now must awaken."

the start is sethis full-blown lack of sincerity.

coat the neglect in lubricant bleeding profusely from a small, but deep wound in his abdomen

made from silky smooth almond oil, diluted with acridity spitting in disgust and fear

your end is set

lie in the softest sheets

made from the sinew and minnow, the blood and the offalout of her control

but the between

well...

lie in the swaddling

made from expensive yarn and cotton, of ruses and sleight of hand

...that's the good stuff

Was the last 10 years of their life together a total lie?

how's the dash goingtried in vain as she did to apply pressure

how are you doing?A black shadow, tendrils and a mouth with a thousand teeth as sharp as cleavers that were the gateway to a never-ending chasm.

focused. Focused. Are we...

ever? Am I?

...

as cliched as it ison the wound,

the start is set

your end is setrealising almost immediately

but the between"Paulus, ouch hoer ich sagen, das sippe blut von wazzere niht verdirbet"

wellthat the blood loss was worse than she initially thought

that's the good stuffhis now empty shell of a skeleton was fully exposed.

made from the vestiges of an empire built on tar andsurfaced...distrust.

the flatline proceeds(orprecedes?) the truth revealed.(precedes, please, precedessomethingelse)

*

Thanks for reading!

Author's Notes: Poem. Had a lot of "fun" putting this together.

I should have added really that the expression "How's the dash going?" was inspired by the person who did my uncle's funeral a couple of months ago. He noted that on all the funerals he has overseen there is a start date and an end date for the deceased, but the important part is the dash between those two dates.

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About the Creator

Paul Stewart

Award-Winning Writer, Poet, Scottish-Italian, Subversive.

The Accidental Poet - Poetry Collection out now!

Streams and Scratches in My Mind coming soon!

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Comments (11)

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  • D.K. Shepardabout a year ago

    another wonderful Paul puzzle poem that has so many parts to revisit and meander through! Very dynamic piece!

  • The Invisible Writerabout a year ago

    Wow that was a wild ride great job Paul

  • Katherine D. Grahamabout a year ago

    I love the dash comment in reference to life and death.las for the poem-- i enjoyed the physical liasons between the broken lovers thoughts

  • Now this is my kinda fun hehehehehe. I loved it so much 🍩🥐

  • Rachel Deemingabout a year ago

    The disjointed joining of these two both show visually and textually the fractured relationship. I mean, as an experiment it's pretty effective. I read it a couple of times too, to get a greater sense of it and read the two things separately to hear the individual voices but the overlap is what makes the poem. Nicely done. You are the emperor of experimentation!

  • John Coxabout a year ago

    I ended up reading the italicized poem first and then returning to read it in its entirety to better follow the perspective of both characters in the poem. This is one of your most visceral poems, which is saying something, given the visceral writing is pretty much your wheelhouse. The pic reinforces that to the extreme. The imagery is powerful and the line - what was once asleep, now must awaken, is literally the poem's wakeup call for the male character although it seems like it came too late. It is also wonderful writing. I liked this a lot, Paulus! Sehr gut!

  • Cathy holmesabout a year ago

    That was wild. Two poems in one. Definitely surreal. Well done, buddy.

  • Cindy Calderabout a year ago

    Your poem definitely excelled in the surreal realm. I had to read it a few times just to get the final impact. Well done.

  • Testabout a year ago

    Lol "fun" as in FUN!!!!! or "fun" as in fun....... 😅 Great work though, my favourite line was "what was once asleep, now must awaken." Nicely, done Paul!!

  • Mark Grahamabout a year ago

    This is quite different and yet kind of fun to read.

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