Apparently II: Is All of This Just a Contest?

I can't seem to get from underneath,

this constant pouring rain,

downstream from hope,

my heart, or what used to be

was washed away, but-

Apparently, the game is a comparison of pain.

Measuring lengths of rope against each other

to see who has it worse,

because we apparently, just can't be, and live, together.

Everything is a fatal scale‐

past trauma vs. present trials,

his last straw vs. all of her tears,

every voice has reached the end of its volume dial‐

this war was the world's choice,

and it has gone on for years.

Apparently, pain is a badge

something to brag,

and must be weighed against what others drag.

I'd rather not be apart of it...

convincing the world that the rain I'm under is the heaviest,

proving to the public that my heart poured out the most,

is not why I'm here.

Apparently, for some, it is‐

and apparently, for others, they just can't see it‐

unable to relate,

unknowingly adding fuel to the fire of the debate‐

my pain vs. your pain,

and your screams vs. my tears,

everyone's on teams,

and all torture and torment is organized into tiers.

Apparently, we've gone from gaslighting,

to the cruelty of comparing our critical thinking.

Apparently, this life is just a contest,

to see who is contested the most,

to see who's been at the lowest,

a card game, in which the worst hand wins.

Why is this what I see?

Apparently, this is what things have come to be‐

this what the world has turned into,

or at least, apparently.