Admittedly lately

Admittedly lately

I lied to the world

I lied to myself

As i sit here and wonder if tomorrow

Is even worth the wait

If the future is true

If the past is scary

I lied

Oh How I Lied

I’m not fine

I'm dying inside

Images of my death flashes in my mind

The image of the moaners

The image of the lies the preacher so sweetly hums out

For the living’s benefit

For yours

But it's not too late

The knife has not made its path

The pills haven’t taken root

The gun hasn’t been fire

The ground hasn’t escaped me

The rope hasn’t tightened

If only I could scream out

But it comes and goes

I need help

I am okay

Its fine

Truly its fine

I will survive

I will thrive

Everything is okay

But admittedly I have lost myself in the life

I’m so confused

I just want to cry

It's quite alright

I will survive

Because I am far too stubborn to give in

So here I stand

AndI admit to the things that

I Have done lately

Admitting to what has happened

All so I can be here

So admittedly lately

I’m lost but i am okay