Acutely Aware

I’ve woken up three times tonight

The doctor called it fight or flight

So I’ll fly to your couch in my mind

The scratchy pillow’s soothing salve

An automatic safety valve

Releases the pressure when I’m boiling

Just real enough to fall to sleep

Like the shepherds counting sheep

Until I wake and find out you’re still gone

I’d be ashamed to fill the void

With something else so I avoid

The thought about as often as I can

Still my body keeps the score

I’d wonder why my back is sore

But then again I’m acutely aware

Acutely aware you were remarkable

Acutely aware of the cardinal

Acutely aware that the past is only that.