A Poem of Dirty-Sounding Words That Make Me Laugh

Sometimes I act like a little kid,

I hear certain words and flip my lid.

“skid”

There’s never really been a choice,

The word is said in someone’s voice.

“moist”

I wish my reaction to be null,

But here I laugh, as if senile.

“penal”

Even when ill, hot with fever,

wanting sleep or relief, but feeling neither.

“beaver”

I could be imprisoned, rotting in jail,

no chance of escape, stuck in my cell.

“cocktail”

Hearing these words stops me in my spot,

I freeze and try to ignore the thought.

“kumquat”

I probably need to quit being daft,

Attempt to grow up and be a man.

“shaft”

I hope to never testify,

if someone has to ask me why.

“rectify”

I promise I did not medicate,

Hearing this word was just pure fate.

“masticate”

I would prefer not to divulge,

please don’t ask, I won’t indulge.

“bulge”

The night’s been long and time a thief,

I should get up and brush my teeth,

“beef”

Even as the night time falls,

One more word, to me, it calls.

“balls”

I should get up and go to bed,

It’s getting late, that’s what she said,

“head”

This went too long, it’s sort of dumb,

at least I laughed a lot, then some.

“come”

I suddenly have a breathing loss,

my wife stares at me, quietly cross.

“meat sauce”

Not even one more word or peep

It’s time to cuddle and go to sleep.

*deep