70/30

I asked- How often do you just tell me what I want to hear?

"90% I'm authentic, 10% what you want to hear."

That number sat well with me.

Until I waited too long.

"Maybe 80/20," they offered,

watching my pause,

I thought,

I could work with that.

"okay 70/30, yes, that seems right"

and I trembled with the weight

70% love, 30% contentment

70% loathing, 30% distaste

70% freezing, 30% discomfort

70% sticky sweat, 30% warmth

70% empowerment, 30% hesitation

70% insecurity, 30% self doubt

70% resilience

70% peace

70% overwhelming authenticity

But what I want

is the 90%

of you

that others never see.

If I have that,

then 10%

won't sting

I'll know what you hold back from me

Is so much less than what you hold back from your reality.