The People Who Are Harmful to Your Self-Esteem

Do you have a strong sense of insecurity? Then you should stay away from these personality types at all costs.

There are those persons in our self-esteem path that make things more difficult to balance. It's difficult for us to recognize the good in ourselves because of their nasty personalities and boundary-pushing habits, and that's not a nice place to be. In these relationships, our self-esteem is damaged, and their poisonous personalities alter our perceptions of connection.

Don’t make your journey to loving yourself more challenging than it has to be. Instead, be honest about who you’re bringing into your life, and how they’re affecting you. Then take steps to rid your life of these toxic personality types before they bring you back down to the place you’re working so hard to leave.

The types of people who are bad for your self-esteem.

You can argue it or claim that there’s “no such thing” as a bad person, but it’s irrefutable that some people are just bad for us. We all have different energies and different needs. Our relationships reflect that. Surrounding ourselves with people who drain our energy or take advantage is a sure-fire way to get ourselves torn down from the inside out.

Total energy drains

Ever been around someone who just makes you feel totally exhausted? Some people are draining to be around. They can overwhelm you with stories about themselves, and some of them hog conversations and pour criticism over anything that you say. As they drain you, you can become critical and negative yourself. It’s not a good place to be when you’re trying to build self-esteem.

Big time braggarts

Nobody likes a braggart. It’s true. You know the type. The ones who can’t stop talking about themselves and all their “accomplishments” any time they get the chance. If we have something good to talk about, they have something better. Just like energy drains, these toxic personalities are exhausting to be around.

They also happen to be terrible for your self-esteem. When you’re always dismissed, or left out of the conversation, it makes you feel bad. Some braggarts will even go out of their way to put you down outright.

Don’t laugh off the big time braggarts in your life. If they make you feel bad about yourself, cut them off. If you can’t cut them off, then keep them far enough away that they can’t hurt your feelings with their self-obsession. That’s the only safe space to keep them in.

Do-nothing takers

There are few things worse than having a relationship with someone who takes advantage of you. These do-nothing “takers” create one-sided bonds with us. They absorb all the love and material care that we have to give, and then they leave us hanging high-and-dry when it comes to returning that investment.

These one-sided relationships wear down our energy and take a toll on our self-esteem. It’s hard to understand how someone doesn’t love us, even after pouring ourselves out into them. But the reality is that they don’t love us. People like this see relationships as commodities and treat them as such. Once you have nothing to offer, you’re no good to them.

Tempered Tanyas

It’s extremely difficult to be around temperamental people. You can’t predict them. One moment they are happy, and the next moment they are exploding in a show of angry vitriol. You have no choice but to walk on eggshells with people like this. You’re trying to avoid “punishment”.

That description alone should make it pretty clear why this personality type is a no-go for our self-esteem. Again, these are people who care more about themselves and don’t really consider the people they’re vomiting their negativity all over.

That’s so bad for you. It’s bad for the way you live your life, it’s bad for the way you see yourself, and it’s bad for the relationship patterns that you’re building. No one has a right to scream and yell at you for no reason. Everyone else needs to adhere to the same laws of respect and civility that we all do.

Boundary pushers

Boundary pushers are bad friends, manipulative coworkers, abusive bosses, and toxic partners. They are people who push us beyond the edge of our comfort in the worst possible way, and they do it all in the name of their own selfish satisfaction.

Are you surrounded by people who push your boundaries? Do they pester you and amp you up until you’re exhausted, or so irritated that you give in?

This is a common tactic for narcissists and absuers and can be an early warning sign of both. Don’t tolerate someone who can’t respect the very important limits you set on yourself and your happiness.

What you should take away…

Even when they’re our friends and our lovers, some personality types are just bad for us. They erode our self-esteem and damage the way we see relationships of every sort and shape. Instead of settling for people who bring down the quality of life we’re living, we are better served by striving to create elevated relationships with people who match our vibes and our needs.

Stop putting yourself in subpar partnerships and friendships. Avoid the boundary pushers, and the people who just take-take-take. You don’t need energy drains and Negative Nancys in your life. Seek instead to invest in those who see the best in you and who want the best for you — just as bad as they want it for themselves and their own lives.