The Little Black Book

Jarica popped up from her towel to head to the restroom. The beach was closing up for the day and she was amazed to see how much garbage was left from the patrons over the past few hours. Beaches seemed less crowded in the pandemic, but as her traveling companions noted: "Humans are still the worst."

She picked up a plastic cup, empty chip bag and headed to the trashcan when she noticed the corner of something hard and black and less trash-like peeking out from the sand. She almost passed it by, the obvious thought was that it wasn't trash so perhaps it was meant to be there. But as she scanned the beach and realized no one was around the area, a voice, her own voice, in her head, said to pick it up.

It was a book, or more, a journal. Surprisingly not wet, she pulled it from the sand easily, as though someone had half-buried it in protection. The sand shook off easily from the hard black cover. Jarica slid the elastic band to the side and opened to pages of writing. What struck her first was the handwriting. Remarkably easy to read, but not childlike, it drew her in with familiarity. She paused in her curiosity of the first few words she saw and flipped back to the inside cover - was there a name? Phone number? A way to return this item to it's rightful owner? The first page did have a section that said: "In case of loss, please return to: ______" and "As a reward $ ______" . The only words though was the name "Sarah" and the reward offered was quirkily answered with "a pile of monkeys" - which made Jarica smile.

"Ready to go?"

Jarica looked up and Lex, one of her three traveling companions, was standing there piled with the cooler bag, wet towels and a smushed sun hat. Jarica closed the book and headed back to her own towel, shoved the book in her backpack and looked forward to a moment alone to read the musings of "Sarah the pile-of-monkeys owner" later.

Later did not come until after group dinner when dishes were put away, the Airbnb tided, end of day showers taken and the travelers retired to their own rooms.

Jarica opened the black book hoping it would both interest her and lull her to sleep.

The first page said:

"I AM health. I AM wealth. I AM walking with the Universe on an easy path to the life I desire."

Then there was a squiggly line sketch of a beach scene - could have been yesterday's beach. The palm trees and waves, sketched toes in sand and few random shells could have been anywhere on this beautiful island.

She flipped to the next page. This one was full of writing, no sketch and seemed to be a similar type of statement, but lengthier this time. It read:

"I AM expressive love. I AM abundant joy. I AM deep and clear in my heart centeredness. I AM rooted in my worthiness. Peace and calm live in my heart. I AM in flow with my day and all that I choose to do. I AM hearing and knowing in my discernment. I AM in love with my body and my health. I AM receiving nourishment and taking on movement in ways that replenish and restore me. I AM easy to love and attracting the deep love of a lifetime - a love full of appreciation, respect, joy and freedom. I AM attracting and receiving financial miracles. Money resource flows to me with abundance and certainty."

Jarica paused to imagine the life this Sarah was having. Did she actually have all those things? For Jarica her eyes kept settling back on the words: Money resource flows to me with abundance and certainty.

Jarica had been thinking about money a lot lately. When wasn't she really? A single mom raising a teenage son, climbing her way from part time gigs, sometimes working five jobs at once - everything from cleaning toilets to bookkeeping to dog sitting - she now worked full time in an administration role at a small company. Full time, salary, health insurance. Yet this trip was the first vacation she had taken in years, and it came as a gift. Theresa and Jeremy - two new friends, a beautiful couple - had rented this condo, procured the plane tickets, booked the rental car - only to have their original guests back out. Jarica received a voice message from Theresa one afternoon with the details and Theresa's words of "Just come, everything is taken care of." It was truly a gift and for the first time Jarica took a leap and accepted it. Here she was at the end of the week, most of her $500 cash she brought to help with food, groceries, gas spent, and she was reflecting on the generosity of her friends and wondering: What if life was always this easy? What if this flow could just continue forever?

Jarica closed the book, her eyes getting sleepy. She shut off the light, ruminating on these thoughts and envisioning a life of flow where money came and went easily, with no extra energy or thought.

The next morning was departure day. Everyone woke up to tidy the condo, make breakfast, pack and be at the airport with a reasonable amount of earliness. Their 1pm flight and 11am arrival at the airport afforded lots of time to catch up on email, Facebook, Instagram and read more in the little black book.

Jarica settled into the black gate waiting area seats and opened her email first. Offers, spam, bills and subscribed emails poured as she hadn’t been opening that button at all on vacation, but there at the top was an email from a name she recognized from work, a woman who had just announced her retirement with the company a week before Jarica left for vacation. The woman was in her seventies, someone Jarica thought of as a mentor actually - both professionally and how she carried herself privately in the world. They had met for a few cups of tea and scones on the woman’s patio back when Jarica was still taking cat sitting gigs when she first started at the company.

Odd she’s writing to my personal email... Jarica thought, but opened up the subject line that just said: “An idea! And a gift for you”.

The email went on to say that the architectural preservation program that Jarica had been looking at applying to over the past year, to the tune of $14,000 was now paid for. The woman wrote in her email:

“As I head into my own retirement, I look back on the moments of my life and who helped me become who I am. You are so much more than this job, this position and company. You have true talent Jarica. I believe in you, your passion, your abilities. You have true vision. Please take this gift and enjoy the program and all you will learn and become.”

Jarica teared up in shock reading this. It felt both like the words she had always wanted to hear and had known about herself, and also completely foriegn and unexpected. Jarica put the phone down and pulled her headphones out, letting the music still play, her mouth agape, and explained the news to her travel companions. She spent the whole flight home smiling, daydreaming out the window about the school and continuing to say out loud, “I just don’t believe it!”

It wasn’t until unpacking that evening that Jarica remembered the little black book and thought to read another page. The next page was full of doodled flowers, made by overlapping circles over and over it seemed, and these words:

“I AM feeling provided with the ideal miracles of wealth that allow me to relax and feel calm. I AM trusting and delighted that my interbeing knows the path of the least resistance to the things that I want. I AM receiving exactly what allows me to handle receiving more with grace and delight.”

Huh, Jarica thought, I am being provided for in ways that allow me to relax and feel calm. I did not know how I was going to pay for the program if I got in, and now it has arrived, no worries, an amazing gift.

Jarica went out to start her car and it wouldn’t start. Panic and irritation started to flood Jarica’s body, but she did remember the words “receive more with grace and delight” - did that mean now?

After a quick phonecall to her mechanic (who also happened to be her dad) and after a few minutes under the hood, it was determined this was not going to be an easy fix.

“I’m sorry sweets, but I think this is the job that breaks it. This car treated you good for ten years, but it’s not going to be worth it to fix this time.”

Jarica felt the panic creep in again.

“However, I do know a guy - an older guy - who is getting rid of a little car, super reliable, that he’s kept in the garage for the past few years, barely driven. Poor guy just lost his license and sees no need to keep it. I think he’s willing to part with it for $3,000 if that’s something you want to do.”

Jarica felt relief wash over. The details of how she’d pay the $3,000 were still hazy but this still seemed like a gift at the right moment, she’d take it.

When they went the next day to look at the car, Jarica’s started off the conversation,

“You know dad, I think I’m getting a tax return in the next few weeks that might be able to cover most of this car. That and if we can get a little for my old one, even at the junkyard, I think I’ll be able to pull this together.”

Dad shook his head.

“No, sweetie. This one is a gift from me and your mom. My shop did pretty good this year and we just helped your sister out with her car lease, helped your other sister with her move to Germany. This is something we want to do for you.”

Jarica was floored. Is this what the book meant by “receive more with grace and delight”?

And it just kept happening like that.

Before the months end Jarica had counted up that she had received the $14,000 tuition for the architectural preservation school, a new $3,000 car, a $500 gift card to the local grocery store from the grateful grandma of two kids she had been taking care of every Sunday for the last year. The note with the gift card said: “we just wanted to thank you for your kindness”.

A $500 cashiers check arrived from Jarica’s brother who had skipped town a few years ago, owing her money he had borrowed in one of his drunken mishaps with a note “I’m sorry I wasn’t better at the time, I’m trying now.”

By the end of the month Jarica had been asked by the friend of a friend to do a sign restoration, and then another for $1,000 each commission. This was work she loved doing on the weekends anyway, as she was prepping her design mind and woodworking hands for restoration school again.

Jarica started using the back pages of the little black book to record in her own writing each time something like this happened. Just four weeks to the day of her finding the black book sticking out of the sand, the gifts totaled $20,000.

She continued to read a page a day of Sarah’s writings, while recording each night in the back empty pages, and the rewards just kept coming like a pile of monkeys.