As I walked with a fellow North American teammate, covered in concrete dust and sweat, it dawned on the two of us that we, as westerners, very rarely take the time to appreciate what is around us. To really look around and enjoy life. Our focus, is primarily on the next task at hand.
The warm gentle caress of the sun brushed against us as we walked through the side streets of Aarhus. Towering cathedrals and buildings from an era all but forgotten surrounding us like concrete mountains. The buzz and hum of traffic on foot and wheels scurrying by. Everyone looking down at their phones, ear phones in and head down in a rush to nowhere fast.
These fixtures throughout our stroll began to flashback to the cities I have seen and lived in. In the distance, a few people resting and relaxing after a long day of work and fewer still engaging with the world around them. Surrounded by concrete, glass and plastic, the senses become dulled over and a melancholy envelopes the city dweller. Our fear of others, to not stand out and to blend into the grayness of a city becomes greater and greater as time passes and we become one with our environment.
We paused to take a look around our surroundings. A dulled red cathedral, its bell tower jutting towards the heavens with faded green roofs contrasting against its weathered red walls. Trees slowly changing from green to the their true essence of red and yellow for autumn. People scattered around the courtyard, spots of grey, black, white, and brown speckle tables and benches as people huddle around for coffee and beer. The humming melody of foreign languages, laughter and singing. The drumming of feet across the wooden canal bridge. These were the sights and sounds of life, the rolling emotions and timing which needed nothing but the presence of people. This represented the heartbeat of a small city coming to life on a Friday afternoon.
In life, love and career why are we so focused on the next thing. What is our obsession with progression? The lives we follow have no set rules to play by and the world which we inhabit has multiple paths for us to try. Rushing, pushing and striving for something is great but don't forget to take some time along the way to be in the moment. To laugh, to really enjoy the place you are in, to smile and enjoy the company that we are with. The details of life are just as worthy as big accomplishments. The taste of good coffee, the smell of fall and the foundations around us which we pass by without a second thought. Begging for our attention to be explored, appreciated and enjoyed. By taking that extra minute to appreciate the lives we lead it can bring a greater sense of satisfaction to our lives, allow us clarity to review our path and most of all bring some peace to a rather chaotic pace.
For many, it is wake up, work, home, sleep. Repeat process until the weekend. We begin to fall in the partner of life but not of living. Where is the time to truly sit down and have an engaging experience with the people that we see daily? Why not take a risk and talk to that person who has caught our eye? From my experiences and the conversations that I have had, fear of rejection holds most people back. Nobody wants to feel rejected, let's be honest it isn't a great feeling but it doesn't make us any less. It makes us brave and bold, embracing the life we were meant to experience.
The other piece that seems to pop up, feeling like we are in a race with those around us. That our friends may be engaged, graduating, getting that career job and we, are falling behind in this imaginary race. Nobodies paths are truly set out for them. By feeling that we are glued to one thing or one track in life is dangerous. It can lead to feeling a lack of fulfillment and joy.
The Japanese use a technique called forest bathing to reset and ground themselves in the middle of a busy life. By taking 30 minutes to go and sit within nature, surrounded by flora and fauna, brings back a sense of balance. This is a lovely idea which is backed up with research on the benefits of both physical and mental well being. It opens up a pathway for us to be more one with the world we live in and to leave the hustle and bustle of life behind us for a little period throughout our day. We are beings of nature and connection, for me the mountains and a good hike are needed at least once or twice a month. Without that break in my routine I begin to feel sluggish and trapped.
As a small town Canadian, moved to big city. Friday night and Saturday lead to going out to crowded and back bars for a pint, food and usually a hangover the following day depending on the length of the night. It is another distraction away from our reality. It only masks a longing to connect to other humans or a piece of our lives we want to change. Now, I am not saying going out to have fun is wrong. I am drawing the focus to those who fill their lives with distractions and seem to not enjoy the time to connect. It is their way of hiding and maybe it is time to ask the tough questions of whether that person, job or degree is for you. It might be a higher calling to do something different.
Take the time to be creative and take off the mask that we wear throughout our days. Follow the hobbies, adventures and ideas that flow within you. Appreciate that time to create and be present. If I can impart some ideological philosophy take from the Danes and follow hygge. Hygge is finding joy in whatever that could be for you and implementing that as often as you can from small things all the way to bigger pieces. It can be as simple as a nice cup of coffee with a friend or on your own to a family dinner and sharing positive memories. This ideology will be different for everyone. Whatever that may be for you enjoy it and remember to enjoy the journey and the pieces that make that path along the way.
Twitter & Instagram: @altsy01
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For the longest time, I believed my life was simply paused. Not broken. Not finished. Just waiting. Waiting for the right moment. Waiting for the right person. Waiting for something—anything—to arrive and change everything. I didn’t know exactly what I was waiting for, but I was sure it would come. People always said things like “It’ll get better” or “Your time will come”, and I clung to those words like promises written in invisible ink. I believed that if I endured long enough, life would eventually reward my patience. So I waited. I waited quietly, because I didn’t want to be a burden. I waited politely, because I didn’t want to seem ungrateful. I waited silently, because I didn’t even know how to explain what was wrong. From the outside, my life looked acceptable. I functioned. I showed up. I smiled when it was expected of me. I laughed at jokes that didn’t reach my heart. I answered “I’m fine” so often that it started to feel like muscle memory. But inside, something was eroding. 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That realization didn’t arrive with clarity or relief. It arrived like grief. Heavy. Sharp. Unforgiving. I remember sitting alone, staring at nothing in particular, and feeling the truth settle into my bones. There would be no rescue. No sudden turning point delivered by someone else’s effort. No moment where everything magically aligned and lifted me out of my own life. It wasn’t that people didn’t care. It was that everyone was busy surviving their own storms. I had been waiting for someone to save me from a life that only I was living. And for a while, that realization shattered me. I felt abandoned by the world, betrayed by hope itself. I questioned every prayer I had whispered into the dark, every moment I had chosen patience over action. I wondered if I had misunderstood life completely—if the promises I believed in were never meant for people like me. I mourned the version of myself who thought endurance alone was enough. There is a special kind of loneliness that comes from realizing your pain is invisible. That no matter how heavy it feels to you, the world keeps moving at the same pace. Bills still need to be paid. Responsibilities still demand attention. Smiles are still expected. So I kept going. But something inside me had cracked open. Once you see the truth, you can’t unsee it. And the truth was this: waiting had become my hiding place. Hope, without action, had become an excuse to stay small. I had been standing still, convincing myself that stillness was strength. It wasn’t. Saving myself didn’t begin with confidence. It began with fear. Fear of staying the same. Fear of waking up ten years later in the same emotional place. Fear of realizing that I had wasted my own life waiting for permission to live it. I didn’t suddenly become brave. I became tired of being helpless. The first steps were almost embarrassing in their simplicity. There was nothing poetic about them. 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