Surviving Homelessness

When everything in your life dumps you in your car without a home and no money, what goes through your mind? Is it how did I end up here? Or how do I get out of here? For me, it was the latter.

I was living in an extended stay hotel and things were going fine. I got paid every week from my job and paid my rent every week. But then I was getting fewer hours and getting paid less. I realized I wasn't making enough money to pay for my room. So, I proceeded to try to get more hours at work, but they didn't have any to spare. I called my sister who lived far from me and a friend and both were able to get me through two more weeks at my hotel, but then I was homeless after that.

And you're thinking, couldn't I have gotten a loan, stayed with someone until I got on my feet again? I couldn't have gotten a loan because my credit was horrible and I lived too far away from my friends and family. I also had too much pride to let anyone see how far my misfortunes led me into the depths of despair. My feelings at the time were that I got myself into this mess, so I will get myself out of it. But how? It was the middle of winter for goodness sake.

There was no way I'd go to a shelter. I didn't know too much about them, but I figured I didn't want to be a woman in a room full homeless men. All sorts of horrifying things could have happened to me in one of those, I thought. So, I had about 20.00 in my account and half a tank of gas. I just had to survive until payday, at the end of the week, get back in my room, and find another job. I could charge my phone to my car and buy just enough food every day to keep me from starving. Everything I owned was in my car, so my clothes were my blanket and pillow, and I went to the closest open 24-hour store to use the bathroom and take sink baths. I also refilled my water bottle there. I parked my car at my job site and set my phone timer at night so I could be at work on time.

At work, I would arrive early enough to clean up and change clothes in the ladies room and be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed on the outside but desperately scared and miserable inside. While at work, I searched for jobs on my off time and was truly grateful there was free coffee there. The week was the same every day until Friday came and I had enough money to get my room back. I didn't have to pay for a room for a week, so I had enough to get me back in with a little money to spare to get me through the next week as well. But then I realized I was fighting a losing battle. I would be in the same situation again in two weeks.

I called my son and told him what was happening to me, and he came and got me. He flew into town and drove back with me in my car. We made it back to his house in two days. The relief I felt knowing I had a roof over my head and would not have to worry if I would have enough funds to cover a room every week or a meal every day was mind-blowing. I found a decent job and eventually got my own place, (a real apartment) soon after that. My son would come to visit me and make sure I was OK and we helped each other get through one crisis after another, which made me realize that if you can do things on your own that was great, but, if a time came that you couldn't, it's OK to ask for help.